August 7, 2012
One of my favorite things ever is being the go-to girl of naughtiness for my friends. When I was in elementary and junior high my friends turned to me for advice of all types on boys. In junior high I was notorious around my school for being the girl who wrote the dirty stories. Everyone wanted to read those stories… who was I to argue with that? In high school, I was the one who bought all the condoms (though I never used them… I know, such a bad girl). If you wanted to talk about sex, how to, why, just hear wild stories.. I was your girl.
I have always been about sex. Oh, there’s plenty more to me but hugely prevalent in my personality is my love of sex and all things sex related. When I was very young, I remember feeling wetness between my legs that didn’t have anything to do with going to the bathroom. I slid my finger into that wetness, curious about it. Bringing my finger away and up to my line of sight, it was visibly wet, I smelled it, licked it… tasted myself for the first time when I was maybe eight years old. I remember finding porno mags and illustrated sexual position books in my dad’s bedroom and getting very squirmy looking at them. I found the bathtub faucet at a very early age. I remember being in the fourth or fifth grade, laying on my back in the tub with my bottom against the wall of the tub and my legs strait up and open so that the water cascaded down over my clit. I had no idea, then, what a clit was or what an orgasm was but I was certainly having my share of them. I would close my eyes and imagine a line of handsome princes each one coming to me and trying to make “it” happen. The princes would uses their hands on my naughty places and some used their mouths, like I had seen in my dad’s books, some would just kiss me. I had no word to describe what ”it” was… I just knew it took a few of the imagined princes before “it” happened. I also found that changing the temperature of the water from warm to extremely cold or very hot made “it” happen a lot faster. I pretty much haven’t stopped touching myself since. And, oh hell.. when I realized just how sensitive my nipples were… can’t keep my own hands off of them.
I remember, at elementary school age, kissing my girlfriends on the mouth, slipping my tongue in unexpectedly just to see what their mouths would taste like. In junior high I used my lighted vanity mirror to look at my naked pussy. A big black ant was crawling around on the floor where I was sitting. I was very horny (not a word I knew at the time, but that was the feeling) and I was watching all those little legs move and started wondering what that might feel like. I picked the ant up and put it down on one of my lips. It crawled around a while. It’s legs crawling about tickled. Then it bit me… ouch! I didn’t know big black ants bit… I guess they do
I continued to be fascinated with sex, with my body and the bodies of everyone around me. I kept a diary and the back few pages held a list of all the boys I had kissed and what I thought about the kisses. I was never anyone’s girlfriend for very long and being my boyfriend was not a requirement for kissing me. I was so curious. I wanted to know what all the kisses felt like, how all the lips tasted. I started to get a reputation for being a slut. Honestly, except for Sunday mornings in church when I was drowned appropriately in guilt, I could have cared less and embraced my inner slut.
I kissed, I made out, I wrote naughty stories, I made everyone I knew blush. I explored myself and anyone around me who I was attracted to. I was rarely… wait, scratch that… I was never told no. I started having sex when I was fourteen (you can read a little about that in this post). I was the girl who you wanted to talk to when you wanted to talk about sex. I listened, I advised, I gave courage and instruction. I took my girlfriends to the clinic and forged the parent’s notes so they could get on birth control and I bought the pregnancy tests when there was a scare. I was the crazy girl. The girl with no fear. The girl who just did not give a fuck what you thought of her. I was fun!
I went through a very strange time in my life when I married shortly after high school because I found myself pregnant. I was then mostly monogamous for the next seven years. I say mostly, because damnit… I’m just not good at monogamy. It was only physical once but holy hell did I have some sultry steamy hot fuck sessions in my imagination during those seven years (and all of them with people who I was not currently married to).
Then I met my current husband and found swinging. Now, that was an exciting discovery! I get to spend my life with a man I love completely AND I get to flirt with and fuck other people!!! I was SO in. Even better than that, we discovered kink and BDSM and that there are thousands of other twisted, naughty, delightfully wonderful kinky fuckers out there! Then on top of that we discovered polyamory and suddenly I had words to define all the feelings I had experienced over the years. Suddenly my life made sense. I was not crazy. It is perfectly possible to love more than one person. Perfectly possible to have and maintain more than one intimate relationship. It is perfectly ok to be tied up and spanked and even better to do it front of others who enjoy watching your responses to that violent stimulus. I was the happiest I might have ever been.
As I have grown older and gained more experience and how to, I find that I remain the go-to girl for my friends. Just last week, my best friend (since we were 12) texted me to ask what a butt plug was and why would anyone want to use one. I had so much fun answering her questions and even better than that, I truly loved being able to direct her to my online store to find a good starter plug and suggested progressive plugs as she becomes accustomed to them. Today, on twitter, one of my followers told one of our mutual followers that she believed I could help pick a good set of nipple clamps. That simple tweet brought such a smile to my face!
I have to admit, being the go-to girl for sex / kink related chat, issues, advice, etc., is something that makes me silly with happiness. I have always thought I would be a great sex therapist (similar to Mom Focker from Meet the Parents — I LOVE her completely). At this late stage of my life, it will probably always be in a non-professional manner but I am happy as a plug in an anal slut’s ass to be the one you turn to when it’s time to talk about sex! To make life even a little sweeter, I get to spend my days peddling sex toys and in doing so spend my time inundated with sex and sex related talk!
Some days, it is simply good to be me
July 18, 2012
Wow. What an incredible day. The Kinky Custom was approved for a merchant account which just means that now I can accept credit cards without the customer having to leave my site and go to the paypal site. This is super exciting news for a couple of reasons.
1. Customers don’t leave my site when they check out now.
2. Some people are not fans of paypal so this will offer them a payment option and hopefully result in more sales.
3. It’s a huge boost to the level of professionalism for the store.
I worked all day to get the merchant account integrated with my shopping cart and it finally is! yah! Then I created a new banner for the home page of the site to make the announcement about the credit cards and a new footer, which I really like.
Tomorrow I’ll be adding a couple of new designs to the store.
I have so much going on. I have contracted with a candle maker to offer the low-temp, perfect for bdsm play candles. I have the paddle maker standing by waiting for our next custom paddle order and just in the last week or so, I’ve contracted with a leather artisan to make specialty and custom made leather masks and other leather goods with the possibility of expanding into a line of bdsm focused furniture. It’s very exciting!
I was supposed to go and see the manager of a local bookstore about a job today. I got so wrapped up in the work on the site that I totally forgot. So, not sure where that’s going to leave me as far as getting a regular job until the site kicks off and starts bringing in a steady stream of revenue.
To lay the proverbial icing on the cake of an incredible day, my friends back home finally installed skype on their computers and I was able to see all their smiling faces today.
This is an excellent day! Thanks for dropping by. Go check out the store www.thekinkycustom.com and find something you can’t leave without
~ Bella xoxo
July 18, 2012
I have finally decided to add a kinky web site design business to my list of ventures. Kinky Bella Designs will be the naughty counterpart to my very vanilla site design business.
The first order of business is The Kinky Custom. TKC has been in business since October of 2011. I absolutely love being able to create and design and sell merchandise specifically for the kink community. As an active member of the BDSM / kink scene, this store is really close to my heart. I love the way the re-design came out and every day something new and exciting seems to be happening with the store!
It’s very exciting and very scary at the same time. Stay tuned lovers, it only gets better from here!
~ Bella xoxo